My God Will Be Faithful {A Reflection Pt. 1}

Well, I finished my freshmen year of college. 

All my papers are turned in and all my exams are done. This last weekend I have been trying to think back on this year. I have been asking myself what I should take away from the year. What did I really learn?

To be honest, I learned a lot. I gained a ton of factual knowledge about both the Old and New Testament, I learned about what the core values of youth ministry should be, and I learned about the history of secularization in the Western World. {Feel free to ask me more ;)}

I think more than any of that though I learned about who I am, who other people are, and how we function in community. 

Going into freshmen year I though I knew who I was...I mean I was 18 years old...I had my life together. Now, I can proudly say that I have little to no clue. 

What I do know is this: I am a daughter of God. I am chosen to be LOVED and CHERISHED by him forever. I have a God who chose to die for me. 

I know that I am loved, that I am set free, and that I am set apart. 

On the other hand though I have no clue what in the world I will end up doing with my life. I mean yeah I have a few dreams but I don't know how or if they'll play out. 

But I have learned this year that I don't have to have my life tied into a pretty bow at the age of 19. I mean yeah it really stinks to not fully know who your are or what you believe or what you want to do with your life but hey in the long run God's got it. 

And yeah I am going to be honest...I don't always live like I know this. There has been countless times this last year where I have freaked out because I can't figure out what God is doing in my life. I have broken down because I felt like I was not enough, like everyone around me was better than me, like I was failing at everything I was doing. 

I mean...I'm not perfect...I have break downs and melt downs and every other type of "downs" that are possible.

BUT through it all God has been faithful. Even on the days when I was a mess and ran from people and from him he turned and chased me down.

When I didn't know how I would make it through the semester with my class load he made me fall in love with learning. 

When I was lonely and falling apart He sent me some of the most amazing people imaginable. 

When I was believing lies he had people surround me and speak truth into my life even when I fought back. 

And you know what? Even though I still don't fully know what this summer will look like or what this next year will look like I know this one thing. 

MY GOD WILL BE FAITHFUL. It may not look like how I want it to. Life may not always feel amazing but my God will be faithful.